"CUMA JADI BUDAK CINTA": MENGUNGKAP KEKERASAN DALAM PACARAN TERHADAP LAKI-LAKI
Abstract
Abstrak - “Kekerasan” pada umumnya merupakan suatu kata yang diasosiasikan dengan suatu tindakan/perilaku yang dilakukan oleh laki-laki, dan membuat kita tidak dapat melihat subjektivitas yang lain bahwa ternyata laki-laki juga dapat mengalami kekerasan, terutama dari perempuan sekalipun yang seringkali secara fisik dianggap lebih lemah dari laki-laki. Ada data-data tertentu yang menunjukkan bahwa wacana ini juga terjadi pada laki-laki. Contohnya saja, data dari Weiss pada tahun 2010 di Amerika yang menunjukkan bahwa 46% kekerasan yang dialami oleh laki-laki dilakukan oleh perempuan. Walaupun ada secara statistik, namun wacana ini terlihat masih belum terangkat ke permukaan, apalagi berpacaran belum diatur secara khusus dalam peraturan perundangan atau hukum di Indonesia. Kondisi ini membuat saya sebagai peneliti kualitatif tertarik untuk meneliti dan mencari bagaimana pemaknaan laki-laki terhadap kekerasan yang mereka alami dari pacaran sehingga masih belum terangkat ke atas. Hasil penelitian menunjukkan bahwa ada muncul beberapa diskursus maskulinitas tertentu yang bersifat romantis ataupun hegemoni dan secara keseluruhan menempatkan mereka ke posisi subjek dengan ekspektasi power yang tinggi sehingga membuat tindakan yang dilakukan oleh pasangannya adalah bukan kekerasan. Susunan diskursus secara keseluruhan muncul dalam bentuk yang berbeda, namun sejenis dengan diskursus yang muncul pada kekerasan terhadap perempuan sehingga dapat disimpulkan keduanya sama pentingnya untuk disorot.
Kata kunci: laki-laki, maskulinitas, wacana, diskursus.
Abstract – Usually, “violence” is a word that associated with a condition where the behaviour was done by a man towards a woman. This condition made us can’t see the other subjectivities, such as when a man experiencing violence especially from the women in dating, that usually considered weaker than men. There are some data that shown this discourse really happen to men. For example, Weiss’ research (2010) in America shown that 46% of violence that happen to men was done by women. Even there are some statistics and other research, but unlikely the violence against women discourse, this discourse still not yet appeared clearly in the public, as we know that Indonesian civil law have not yet legalized any law regarding to dating unlike the marriage. As a qualitative researcher, this condition made me feel interested to do more research about this topic and find how men interpret the violence that happens from their girlfriend to them and made this discourse doesn’t clearly appear in the public/academic area. The results shown that appears some form of masculinity like romantic masculinity or hegemonic that generally place them on a subject position with a high expectation of power practice as a man and made them interpret the behaviour that they receive, especially the violence behaviour as a non-violence behaviour. Generally, discursive formations that emerge from all participant shown in a different form, but have the same kind of formations that emerge from violence against women so we can conclude that violence against man or violence against women have the same importance to emerge it to the public or academic area.
Keywords: man, masculinity, discourse
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References
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